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Saturday, May 31, 2008

Why Do Many Filipina Girls Marry Foreigners?

By Peter Finch

A Filipina in her early twenties, clad in a tight-fitting pair of jeans, a body-hugging shirt walks on a busy street in the Philippines. She attracts attention not only because of her looks but because she is holding hands with a foreigner who is old enough to be her grandfather.

Two blocks away, a woman in her late forties is hanging on to the arm of a 65-year old foreigner. Both women will be marrying their boyfriends soon and each had her own reasons. Every year more Filipina ladies are leaving the country each year to marry a foreigner. Here are some of the common reasons for these marriages:

The search for greener pastures.

It is undeniable that a big percentage of the Filipina girls who marry foreigners look at their husbands as a "visa" for them to go find better opportunities abroad. Filipina ladies have a mission to support their family as soon as they are able to, like help send younger siblings to school or take over the responsibility as the head of the family.

Travel and adventure

A foreigner husband is a ticket to exciting worlds beyond the desolate place she may have grown up in. She looks at him as the realization of her childhood dreams of traveling to far places.

Status elevation

As ironic as it seems, majority of the Filipino women prefers American love stories over Philippine films and they get all dreamy eyed and instantly fall in love when they see a caucasian man.

Age factor

While a woman in her late thirties is considered in the prime of life in other countries, it is not the case for a Filipina because when she is past 30 and is still unmarried, eyebrows will start to rise and her chances of getting married starts to get slim and meeting a foreigner for a prospective husband online is one of her few choices. Usually, a Filipina marries in her late teens or early 20s and should already have a child in college by the time she is 40 years old.

Failed marriages

Failure in her marriage could also push Filipina ladies to look to foreigners for a second chance. Some of these Filipina ladies are unwed mothers, while others are victims of abusive husbands, forced to do menial jobs for a meager pay just to support her children.

Average looks

An average looking Filipina (meaning not the beauty queen material) may feel she does not have to go to lengths and pay huge amounts to augment her physical features to attract a foreign husband-to-be.

True Love

You may find it hard to believe this but despite the perception that the Filipina is taking a risk marrying a person with a different set of values with a different cultural background, love could be the reason why she will marry a foreigner.



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Friday, May 30, 2008

What Does A Filipina Lady Look For In Her Ideal Man

By Peter Finch

As any other normal human being, each Filipina girl has her own ideals or qualities that she looks for in a man who will be her partner for life. She would not expecting a very wealthy Mr. Universe to come pounding on her front door to offer her the whole world on a platter, but undeniably, she is on the lookout for that special someone who shares her interests, understands her and who can fill the void in her life. Here are some of the qualities that a Filipina female generally looks for in a man:

A man who shows respect. You can easily win the heart of a Filipina if you show her respect. She will feel loved and cared for and get a feeling that she matters to you.

A well-groomed man. Most Filipina females are not very concerned about a man's looks, but it is important for her to see her man clean, and well-groomed. It will not hurt if you take a daily bath and pay attention to clean your fingernails!

A good listener. Growing up in a patriarchal society where men take center stage, the Filipina women often play the second fiddle and sometimes, men just do not listen to them or make their opinions count. Women want men who treat them as their equals, men who listen and hear what they want to say, and somebody she can talk to.

A loving and giving man. The need to be loved is inherent in everybody, and Filipina women are no different. They want to be loved, cared for and appreciated for who they are. A woman wants a man who lets a woman be herself, who gives her freedom to think and act as she wants to. She wants to feel that she is giving as much as you in the relationship and that you are giving as much as she is.

A man who is honest and loyal. This may seem like a tall order but due to her conservative upbringing, a Filipina woman will not turn deaf and blind if you flirt with other women or worse, get involved in extra-marital affairs. Do not expect her to understand if you tell her the affair was just a fling because for her, that is cheating.

A principled and romantic man. A Filipina female wants a man who has a firm set of principles and will stand by what he believes in no matter what. As a Filipina woman is romantic by nature, she is also looking for a man who is not predictable and is full of surprises. This is one secret that keeps the romance going in the relationship.

A stable man. All women want a man who is willing to support his family. Filipina girls grew up in a culture where men are the breadwinners of the family. This does not mean they require a man to be rich but they need to be reassured that you are there for them, and they can rely on you. Finally, women are drawn to nice, interesting and self-confident men who carries a good dosage of sense of humor with them.



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Thursday, May 29, 2008

Filipina Dating

By Peter Finch

So you are really keen on dating a Filipina woman? Crossing cultures is a risk filled with challenges as both of you comes from different backgrounds and reared up in different cultures and ideas.

You may have a different view when it comes to dating. When you want to date a Filipina lady, you just do not come up and ask her out right the first time you see her. You have to start by befriending her, and it takes a long process before you can finally take her out on a date. Her conservative upbringing taught her to be wary of strangers, and as a foreigner you pose as a threat and challenge at the same time.

When she finally consents to go out with you, chances are she would want to go to a public place like restaurants, mall, games, or events where she can see friends and other familiar faces. A friend or two may even accompany you during your dates and this makes her feel secure. She is also sensitive to your behavior during your dates and she will not allow you to show affection especially as you are seen in public. She considers dating time as too for kissing or even holding hands.

Relationships with Filipina ladies pass several stages and if you are planning to take a Filipina for a bride, you have to take a long bumpy ride. Filipino women cannot afford to be fast, they are expected to be pakipot (hard to get) because it is seen as an appropriate behavior when they are courted. A Filipino girl never shows her admirer that she is also in love with him immediately.

She may go out with you alone after you both come out in the open and inform her family and friends about your relationship. When you go out with a Filipina lady and you are contemplating on taking her for a bride, it is considered improper if you will not meet her parents and her family for a formal introduction. Family matters most for a Filipina woman and you must learn to accept that.

There is a common but unspoken rule in the Philippines that says "When you court or date a Filipina girl you are not courting or dating just her, you are courting and dating the whole family". This may seem like a tall order for someone as independent as you but following this rule will help you earn her respect and her family will look at you with high regard.

You should treat your Filipina with respect, lead the courtship with your heart and you may find a lifetime partner that will enrich your life as you have never imagined.

When out on a date, Filipina women are fun to be with when they are already at ease and relax around you. Ever a romantic at heart, a Filipina lady appreciates your creativity and resourcefulness. She loves surprises and unpredictability so if you go the extra mile and exert effort to make your dates unique and memorable, she will treasure your moments together.



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Wednesday, May 28, 2008

The Beauty Of A Filipina - What Makes Her So Special

By Peter Finch

Filipina women are just like any other women in the world. They are humans who seek happiness and fulfillment of their dreams, they are resilient, they laugh and they cry, they win and they fail but after a failure, they can stand up and learn from it.

So what makes Filipina women irresistible? Filipina ladies are warm and caring. Their inner beauty, sunny disposition and charm adds to the physical attractiveness and gracefulness they possess. Filipina ladies are naturally romantic, loving, resourceful and have old-fashioned values. They are optimistic and have flexible personalities. They have the capability to adapt to any situation and accept things they can not change. They are also outgoing by nature and are pleasant company. Equipped with a generous share of great sense of humor, Filipina ladies are prone to see the lighter side of life in sticky situations.

Filipina females are raised in a special sense of honor called delikadesa (daintiness). You can never see a conservative Filipina engage in loud arguments and shouting match because they were taught to be polite and soft-spoken. There are exceptions though because modern-day Filipinas who are influenced by other cultures are losing this trait.

When Filipina ladies enter into a relationship, they look at it as a serious business and a life-long commitment. There is no "absolute divorce" in Philippines so if you are looking for a trial-and-error marriage, look for a bride somewhere else.

Once married, Filipina wives puts her husbands and family at the top of their priority list, and it is their goal to excel in home and family management. They believe in a one-man one-woman relationship and are lifetime partners, holding a high regard for the sanctity of marriage. Filipina ladies are excellent home keepers, and being a good wife and mother is a trophy for her.

Filipina women are willing to sacrifice their own happiness and careers for the sake of their families. They are very supportive to their husbands. The Philippines is under a patriarchal society where the husband is the head of the family but in cases when the husband is unable to fulfill his obligation, like in the case of illness, death or separation by distance, the Filipina wife stands by him and takes the responsibility as the breadwinner on her shoulders.

Filipinas are well educated. As young as three years old, the Filipino children start going to pre-school. Parents too sacrifice and forgo other needs just so their children can finish their studies. This in an edge the Filipinas have over others because they can easily fill in jobs.

Filipino girls are religious. As a predominantly Roman Catholic country, children are raised to be devoted to the church at an early age. A lot of people may think that the Philippines is a factory producing ideal women who will be loyal and take care of their husbands even until their retirement. This is not putting the Filipinas on top of a pedestal but when you take a Filipina for a bride, expect somebody to stay with you for life.



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Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Visa Issues For Your Filipina Bride

By Peter Finch

As incidents of Filipino citizens flying to the United States or other countries and not returning home pile up, government and the foreign embassies were prompted to implement stricter measures in issuing visas.

When a foreigner crosses cultures just to acquire a Filipina bride, he has to go through numerous hassles, like complying with mountains of paperwork, spending hundreds of dollars and waiting for a long time before he can finally take his Filipina bride to his country. Processing the requirements for a fiancée or spouse visa takes time and the length of the waiting time depends on where you live.

You can either apply for a fiancée visa (K1 Fiancee Via) or a spouse visa (IR-1) for your Filipina bride, but you still have to comply with several requirements. There are many specialized lawyers that can help you with this. The law requires that you and your Filipina girlfriend must have been legally free to marry and if your girlfriend is granted a fiancée visa, you have to marry her within 90 days after arrival in your own country.

You may need to show documents to prove your relationship with your Filipina girlfriend so keep track of those emails you exchanged with each other, letters, photos, plane tickets and any other proof that you have a relationship going on.

To obtain a spouse visa for your Filipina bride, first of all you must get married so you can petition your Filipina wife to migrate to your own country. If you get married in the Philippines, you must comply with all the requirements of applying a marriage certificate and getting married whether in the church or civil ceremony.

You must not forget to bring important documents if you want to get married in the Philippines, like your US passport, an Affidavit from the US Embassy, a divorce decree or spouse's death certificate if you were previously married, proof that you have informed your parents if you are 22 to 24, or proof of parental consent if you are 18 to 21 years old. These are needed in filing for a marriage license. Your marriage must be authentic and valid under the Philippine laws, and only then can you file a petition to get a visa for your Filipina wife.

Here is a brief run on the procedures of acquiring a spouse visa. After you return to your own country, you should file a petition with the nearest office of the Immigration and Naturalization Service (INS) where your place of residence is covered. The INS will in turn send the papers to your Filipina bride for her to comply. You and your Filipina bride must return all required forms to the National Visa Center, who will in turn forward all of the documents to the US Embassy, including your Affidavit of Support.

Your Filipina bride will then have to wait for an interview with the consular officer in your Embassy who will determine if she will be issued a visa or not. If you join bride tours, they will take care of all the visa processing and immigration procedures but if you came on your own, you and your Filipina fiancée will have to do the petitioning or applying of her visa.



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